Do not stand at my grave and weep...

I am not there, I do not sleep.

Lovely poem by Mary Elizabeth Frye... and also my contribution to one of the hardest funerals I have ever had the misfortune to prepare for and attend.

January 9th 2009 a wonderful Mother, 'Nana Griff', Wife and Mother-in-Law lost her battle with cancer... Not only was she one of the nicest MIL's a girl could hope for, she was looking forward so much to being a Nana, and, having attended the 12 week scan with us, was also looking forward to seeing the little tyke on screen again, and learning the gender of her unborn first grandchild... unfortunately less than a week before the big Day... the horrible disease that is cancer took its toll, and her life.

R.I.P Judith, the memories of you will stay with us for the rest of our own lives, and your granddaughter (yes folks, its a girl, and the nana watching her from above would be so thrilled to be finally adding a girl to her family after having 3 sons and no daughters) will always know just how wonderful a person you were.

As for our little madam down here, she is playing difficult already (most males would be snorting and universally muttering 'typical female' right about now) and decided we were not allowed to see her face OR her heart, but feel free to have a look between the legs... certainly not a shy little madam we have! Anywho, all it means is that we get to go back for a repeat scan in 2 weeks time to try and get a decent look in the hopes that her little tush has moved. The other bit of news from the scan was that the placenta is classed as low-lying, so there will be yet another scan at 32 weeks to see if it has moved up with the uterus, or stayed down low, therefore possibly determining the route of escape for little miss difficult here.

No scan pics yet, stingy scanner lady this time only gave us 2 pics, neither of which were terribly clear, so it will be a case of play back the video and take snapshots of the TV screen, will do that sometime this week, but in the meantime, bump pic will have to suffice

19w3d

Theres a party in my tummy!

Phew, glad the birthday/xmas rush is over and done with, and all I am left with is a week off work to chill out with, and a Little Turtle who thinks its party time at very inappropriate hours!

Dont really feel terribly grown up yet, but 25 SOUNDS grown up...ish...

On the baby front, everything is ticking along nicely, 16 weeks 2 days today, and little niggles and funny feelings down low that 'could be' Little Turtle moving about, are much more pronounced, and most definitely our progeny making itself known.

Bump pic taken at 16 weeks exactly...




Am starting to look more like a pregnant person, rather than someone who just ate too many toffee pops (and magnums, and cheesecake..hmm.. must re-think dietary intake...and soon...) and in exactly 3 weeks and 4 days, we will be announcing (hopefully, assuming our delightful child who has already shown itself to be QUITE the difficult one already...hmmph) whether we are waiting on a Jayde, or a Lachlan... those are the names we have picked and whittled down so far, but I am always on the lookout for inspiration...

For those trying to be purely evil and laughingly joking maybe theres BOTH.... I can assure you right now that after 3 scans so far, there is most definitely only ONE child growing and partying like its 2008 down in my middle region... someones gunna get sued if a second one pops out to suprise us in 5 months or so!

One more piccy.... This is the xmas pressie courtesy of E who forgot to find time to buy me something, so instead told me to do what I wanted and he would pay for it... so I did what I have been wanting to do for years, and what a difference!

Before....




and now...

Flips and sneaky turns...

Time for my update again...

Been busy little beavers around here, and will continue to be until well after Xmas at this rate. But Thursday night was Scan Night and it was fantastic

We started the scan with baby Turtle facing THIS way... (note for those who cant tell, head is the round bit in the middle, with arms and upper tors to the right of said head)




Then the sonographer turned away to do something on his computer... he came back for another look and hello... little beggar has flipped right round and is now deciding THAT way is better thank you very much (look closely at the head, you can clearly see a little nose and the mouth)



Managed to get a really clear head shot *mutters about little baby's headbutting their mummy's*



aaaaand ladies and gentlemen... THIS is officially why we call this little blighter the Baby Turtle... (think of how you look doing a starfish with a big bungy cord going down between your legs... but the head, which should be to the left, is out of the picture, must have had its head too far forward or backward for the wavelength this pic was taken at)


Gut instinct screams its a boy, although we will have to wait and see if it will oblige in January for the next scan to find out. Little 'darling' would not sit still, kept swimming around and jumping up and down etc... just like Daddy Turtle which the Nana-to-be and I had a wee giggle over, watching him in the car ahead on the way TO the scanning place, his head was always moving around, and never stopped....

Annnywho... baby Turtle is telling me its time for dinner, pity it cant help me out by telling me what it would like for dinner... its going to be a try it and see game tonight...

Fooood...

Yes... another post about food... we all know how I like my food... so why not run with a good topic...or a nice walk at least.

This medication is working wonderfully... the only time we have any hiccups is when someone rather stupidly forgets to take said pills, and spends the rest of the day re-living the week before the Hospital Visit. Needless to say, I very rarely forget my tablets now.

Back to work and trying to take it easy this week, but my neck, back and shoulders seem to disagree with my promise that yes I AM taking things easy... hmmmph.. traitors.

Full steam ahead for the nearly 5 year olds (eek!) birthday party, and the same someone had a brilliant idea and decided to make it a joint party and celebrate her birthday too... yay me...Have one hell of a week set up. Friday 5th (being the big day for Mr 5 going on 13) I am taking annual leave and taking the Boy to the zoo, Saturday we have speedway, Sunday is the big Party, then Monday is my day to stay home and relax... again, I am taking annual leave and doing whatever I feel like doing at the time. Tuesday is the next appointment with the midwife to discuss how Little Turtle is going... oh and THAT Friday is also the work Xmas lunch out at the local beach restaurant... busy busy... roll on Feb when everything goes back to 'normal' and the Kid is at school and maybe then his attitude will slightly decrease once he is no longer the 'big fish in the little pond'... heres hoping anyway

Hospital Food...

Let it be known that the food at a certain South Auckland hosital well and truly lived up to its reputation during my brief stint there on Friday night.

Backing the truck up to the start to catch you all up on the events of the last week.

Seems little turtle here didnt like me eating or drinking. Period. Unfortunately the human body NEEDS such things in order to carry on living. And after a few days of no sustenance... things have to be done. In this case it was 6L of saline via an IV line within 24 hours to put me back on an even keel hydrationally speaking. And the cyclizine injections give you one helluva trip! The kind that I imagine heroin and P addicts pay mega-bucks to get, and one that I will quite happily NEVER go through again! Seriously not a good feeling thinking you are going to fall out of bed while sitting down. And it makes talking rather difficult. And as we all know. I like talking. I like eating too, but the food at that hospital even had ME picking through and eating very little.

I digress.

The point is, we finally won a battle against little Turtle here, and I am back to eating and drinking like a happy little pig-in-the-mud. Albeit with a handful of various medications prescribed by the hospital with strict instructions to keep taking them, regardless of how good I am feeling NOW, as the fact I am feeling good right now only means the drugs are working. And we want them to KEEP working. so I will be taking them until 16 weeks before we attempt to cut back on them.

Oh and even better, I am currently home on Annual Leave for the week to get some rest time while i sort out a new morning routine since the first lot of tabelts have to be taken 1/2 an hour BEFORE eating... time to wave bye-bye to grabbing a muesli bar on my way out the door at 8am in the preschool/work dash

Anyway... a book I have been dying to get my hands on finally arrived in the mail today (google it ;) its called Up The Duff by Kaz Cooke) and I am off for a date with said book in my nice warm bed with music on the TV in the background...bliss...

Bump-in-progress

Not quite the 'House that Jack built'... more like too many toffeepops...urgh... WHY did I just say that... little Turtle here does NOT like anything sweet.... in fact... it doesnt like me eating full-stop... much the same as its big Brother did 5 1/2 years ago... my money is on another male to add to my collection... I am destined to be the sole female on the house. I would count the cat, but she is only included when she feels it is appropriate to be.. so we wont. Not that I would be disappointed, in fact, far from it. I know boys, I can handle (well... kind of) boys. If it came out a girl I would be scared of what the next 20 years were going to bring us.

Anyway... the arrow... yes I know you all can see, and dont need the blindingly obvious pointed out so blatantly... but there is method to my madness. The arrow points to the belly button, the 'bump' is above the arrow... whats below is the result of too many...erm... T words.... and leftover from the sunroof exit the Son made so very dramatically almost 5 years ago... scary thought... he will be 5 years old next month. Can't believe I can say that now.

Theres our baby!

Its a very special feeling knowing that something so tiny (try thinking of a grain of white rice) already has a heart that beats. Nothing can describe the emotion that suddenly hits you as you see that not only are you really, truly having a much wanted baby after all those months of trying, but to actually SEE that tiny little dot and know that it has a life. It IS life. And your life as you know it is going to change, ready or not. That feeling is enough to make a grown man fight a tear as he watches the little tiny dot flicking on the screen and realise that his childs heart, tiny as it is, pumping blood through the tiny little being that is half of him, and half of you.

And honey, if you were finding it hard not to cry then, you just wait for the next one at 12 weeks, by then our little grain of rice will be much bigger, and have hands, fingers, legs, toes... not to mention eyes, ears, mouth and tongue... it will look like a real baby, albeit rather alien-like.

This little Turtle is already feeling the need to dictate anything I eat, as well as when I can eat. Luckily I have 2 foolproof items on the menu... the first which also worked against the Son 5 1/2 years ago, is peanut butter, cheese and gherkin slice sandwiches, the other is plain cooked 2 min noodles, tossed in with a cup of tomato soup made with only 1/3 the required hot water... add italian herbs and little Turtle is in noodle heaven! Unfortunately anything eaten before 5pm that doesnt include the above items in the correct combo is fair game to this little so-and-so...

Much as we love the said so-and-so... food is very important. And not to be given up without a fight. Even if I am fighting food, with more food. I WILL win... when am allowed to.